It's been a while since last posting! We moved into a new home, outside of town, and have been busy getting settled ever since!
I have a few boxes left to sort out, but hoping to be done with sorting out this week. Finally!
I would really like to make this house a home before the baby comes, but not really seeing that possible at this point.
I've been getting overwhelmed at the thought of birth, especially since I don't have the babystuff set up, house is in moving chaos, family across the country...
Right now I am at 34 weeks along, but I'm bigger, without extra weight gain, belly wise than any other pregnancy. So much different that nearly none of my late 3rd trimester clothes fit. It is very discouraging not having clothes fit- including your favorite sweatpants. Plus, trying to move around with my belly feeling like it's going to tear open. Add in movement and activity induced cramping, back spasms and harder than BH contractions, it gets frustrating!
We are wondering if this pregnancy could be a twin pregnancy due to baby movement, hiccups in different spots, severe fatigue, nausea all the time, belly size and shape, that awful rash- which has no allergic correspondence, among a few other things...
Considering the possibility of twins became too much for me today and then I just stopped, remembering some motivational things I re-pinned on my Pinterest.
I just said "Thank you, Lord!". If God has decided to bless us with twins after having 3 other blessings then He will give me the strength and energy to handle it. Goodness knows, I do not have that energy in me anymore after the past few months! God, if He chooses to put us down that path of a multiple birth, then He obviously has a reason, a plan, and a purpose- His purpose. All I have to do is trust in Him.
Funny, trust is the thing I struggle with most in my walk with Him! God has never shown Himself to be anything less than what He says He is. So why do I have issues trusting Him?
Going back to what I know, my issue stems from not keeping my focus on Christ, where it should be! Instead, my focus is on myself and what I can do- which is nothing compared to what Christ can do and has done in my life already!
So, instead of focusing on " How am I going to do it?", I am changing it to: "God is greater".
God didn't create us to live defeated lives, He created us to live fully and abundantly!!!
So instead of keeping that in my brain, I am going to live it. I'm not going to let the foothold of self-pity and depression in my life. I don't have time for that, I want to live fully and abundantly in Christ and praise Him for what He is doing in my life!! Life is as exciting or dull as you choose.
Reminds me of the Toby Mac song " Choose Life". Well, I choose life today beceause I wasn't created to be in the ruts of despair and worry! :-)